HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
