So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Damn victory sex feels great
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
