Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
