Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
