Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Randomize
