just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
You dont lie about slip and slides
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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