My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
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