It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Randomize