I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I just gargled with NyQuil
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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