you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
21 Dirty Secrets From Bachelor/Bachelorette Parties That Have Destroyed Marriages
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
i came on her dog
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
23 Fathers Confess The Best Way They’ve Messed With Their Daughter’s Boyfriend
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread