Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (386): View more from Florida

  That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.

  (954): View more from Florida

  Apparently hers is a theme park.

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  (386): That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground. (954): Apparently hers is a theme park. http://tfl.nu/yoy4
  Replies (8) Good night (1193) Bad night (2174)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"

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  (920): She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets" http://tfl.nu/73nd
  Replies (27) Good night (1105) Bad night (3509)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.

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  (513): She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight. http://tfl.nu/4s7r
  Replies (21) Good night (3485) Bad night (774)
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"

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  (707): I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!" http://tfl.nu/i1ig
  Replies (16) Good night (1354) Bad night (4443)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her

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  (954): had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her http://tfl.nu/teql
  Replies (15) Good night (1156) Bad night (5592)
• Favorite

  (434): View more from Virginia

  do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming

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  (434): do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming http://tfl.nu/c7ht
  Replies (6) Good night (3382) Bad night (904)
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.

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  (734): you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm. http://tfl.nu/i6hi
  Replies (12) Good night (2743) Bad night (1356)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.

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  (615): That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly. http://tfl.nu/01h2
  Replies (7) Good night (2037) Bad night (700)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off

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  (519): my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off http://tfl.nu/nyl9
  Replies (9) Good night (3041) Bad night (583)
• Favorite

  (765): View more from Indiana

  Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.

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  (765): Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown. http://tfl.nu/booj
  Replies (7) Good night (1120) Bad night (586)
• Favorite

  (510): View more from California

  Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.

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  (510): Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day. http://tfl.nu/eul1
  Replies (2) Good night (523) Bad night (402)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.

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  (727): No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember. http://tfl.nu/v8lz
  Replies (3) Good night (1011) Bad night (529)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean

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  (518): I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean http://tfl.nu/nhpo
  Replies (2) Good night (1672) Bad night (451)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift

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  (805): I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift http://tfl.nu/may0
  Replies (0) Good night (585) Bad night (345)
• Favorite

  (719): View more from Colorado

  You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class

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  (719): You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class http://tfl.nu/tmgn
  Replies (1) Good night (367) Bad night (155)

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