hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
She bit a glass in half.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
i now understand why vodka
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Randomize
