Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize