How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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