I've blown a few things in my day
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Randomize
