There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize