Texts From Last Night

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  (212): View more from New York

  mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.

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  (212): mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you. http://tfl.nu/gr31
  Replies (14) Good night (962) Bad night (3735)
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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to

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  (267): If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to http://tfl.nu/tvy7
  Replies (59) Good night (4961) Bad night (1279)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.

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  (631): we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow. http://tfl.nu/crmc
  Replies (30) Good night (3869) Bad night (650)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.

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  (817): New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft. http://tfl.nu/mqah
  Replies (13) Good night (4515) Bad night (1102)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  Bad news is he broke up with me via text message

  (561): View more from Florida

  But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville

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  (561): Bad news is he broke up with me via text message (561): But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville http://tfl.nu/1qx8
  Replies (28) Good night (7115) Bad night (1464)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  he thanks me after handjobs.

  (1-203): View more from Connecticut

  you found the perfect man.

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  (203): he thanks me after handjobs. (1-203): you found the perfect man. http://tfl.nu/eh9t
  Replies (43) Good night (5097) Bad night (1121)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.

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  (404): Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy. http://tfl.nu/vwp7
  Replies (14) Good night (4374) Bad night (1455)
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.

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  (240): my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight. http://tfl.nu/cb14
  Replies (2) Good night (3429) Bad night (857)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.

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  (508): in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar. http://tfl.nu/rqsf
  Replies (9) Good night (1489) Bad night (2457)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you

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  (713): I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you http://tfl.nu/33e4
  Replies (7) Good night (585) Bad night (1080)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.

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  (480): Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight. http://tfl.nu/9xmn
  Replies (3) Good night (1258) Bad night (532)
• Favorite

  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.

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  (780): I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag. http://tfl.nu/8hrl
  Replies (13) Good night (1222) Bad night (608)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.

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  (612): I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them. http://tfl.nu/b8xn
  Replies (3) Good night (743) Bad night (330)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?

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  (206): sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches? http://tfl.nu/kl03
  Replies (6) Good night (1022) Bad night (390)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night

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  (585): I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night http://tfl.nu/wd4l
  Replies (1) Good night (497) Bad night (168)

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