It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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