Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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