i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Randomize
