So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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