Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Randomize
