you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.