is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
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