this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
