Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
