so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
