is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Say something about gay babies.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Randomize
