Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
