Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
