oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Randomize
