So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize
