I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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