I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Randomize
