if i died would you start the facebook group?
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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