i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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