Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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