Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
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Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
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Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
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