yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Randomize
