I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
