My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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