Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Randomize
