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A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
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