I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
