ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Randomize
