I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
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