This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.