i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
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