He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
