hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
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