He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I'm sitting next to this guy at the bar. I wrote him a little song in my head it goes "there is no fucking chance you're getting in my pants" gonna sing it to him after he buys me another drink.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time