KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
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